Growing Pains

When I was a child I would spend every weekend with my grandmother. It was my favorite part of the week. She would take me to Publix and buy me carrot cake and let us pick what was for dinner my sister and I and just all-around dote on us for a whole two days. I remember sometimes at night I would have terrible pain in my legs, and she would rub them, and try to make me feel better. She told me they were just growing pains, and I remember wondering why growing hurt so bad. I don’t fault her for not knowing the pain I  was having was actually a sign of the condition I am now diagnosed with, Chiari malformation. My skull is not big enough for my brain. I look back over my life and I see the signs so clearly. The pattern is so plainly insight now, with each new level of pain I would be in agony and then I would get used to that level and it became just another part of my life. Until the next new level of pain would come. I would wonder what the hell is wrong with me. And then I would get used to the pain again. I’ve done this for 33 years, until a few months ago when I simply couldn’t get out of bed.. when you think about it almost every type of growth hurts at first. Growth pushes us out of our comfort zone. It gets us ready for the next level. It makes us wiser, and lets us be the most authentic version of ourselves. 

Nature Helps to Fill My Cup

Enjoying the beauty of nature with one of my favorite guys

We made it out to one of our favorite places today, Sawgrass Lake. This is something we were supposed to be doing all summer, but, unfortunately I can rarely find the energy for outings like this unless my husband is along for the ride. I was determined today! And thankfully mother nature abliged and kept the rain at bay.

Serenity at it’s best!

We had lofty hopes the heat wouldn’t be to terrible.. Who were we kidding?? It is the end of June in Florida after all. We were just lucky to have a breeze that was not carrying a storm straight for us!

He is no longer amused, and I don’t blame him.

We decide after an hour that it’s best we start heading back to the air conditioning. We saw two baby gators, a handful of turtles, a few birds I’d like to call ducks but they don’t quite fit the bill, and one rather large racoon who is clearly not having any trouble finding food.  

Small black “duck” in the distance
I plan to have as many good days as possible before surgery becomes an even larger reality. With an uncertain future looming in the distance, I am at least able to rest assured on some very lovely truths; 

  1. I am deeply loved
  2. I will not ever be alone, no matter how alone I may feel
  3. And, His Grace is sufficient for me

I find the truth in that, for even as I write I can hear the sky coming to life. 

The sky is coming to life, and we are safe inside.

I like to believe the good Lord knew how badly I needed into nature today, and it was He that kept the rain at bay so that I could refill my cup today.

Afternoon Jam 🎸 Break Watch “Sweet Indian Child of Mine | Baiju Dharmajan | Girish Pradhan” on YouTube

     Good afternoon! I hope it is a good afternoon for you all! 

     I came across this little gem on my morning facebook scroll. I’ve always loved the song Sweet Child of Mine, it makes me think of my daughter and her stunning blue eyes. 

     So when I came across this I was impressed. It took me on a happy stroll down memory lane as I thought about how it made me think of my son now as well. His eyes are not blue like his sisters. They are a deep, soulful brown, but none the less, he is my sweet child.

     I appreciate people who are unconventional. Outside the box. I think we should be so ‘US’, so ourselves, that it is undeniable! Anyway. I hope you enjoy!

https://youtu.be/Sweet Child O’ Mine Cover

     And enjoy the rest of your day!🎶

Sweet Child O’ Mine

Guns N’ Roses

Lyrics

She’s got a smile it seems to me
Reminds me of childhood memories
Where everything
Was as fresh as the bright blue sky
Now and then when I see her face
She takes me away to that special place
And if I’d stare too long
I’d probably break down and cry

Oh, oh, oh
Sweet child o’ mine
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Sweet love of mine

She’s got eyes of the bluest skies
As if they thought of rain
I hate to look into those eyes
And see an ounce of pain
Her hair reminds me of a warm safe place
Where as a child I’d hide
And pray for the thunder
And the rain
To quietly pass me by

Oh, oh, oh
Sweet child o’ mine
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Sweet love of mine

Oh, oh, oh, oh
Sweet child o’ mine
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Sweet love of mine

Oh, oh, oh, oh
Sweet child o’ mine
Oh,
Sweet love of mine…

Why Caring for Ourselves is a Selfless Act

Go into your kitchen and grab an empty cup. Now try and drink from it. Go on, share your empty cup with everyone near you. Are any of you satisfied? NO. How could you be?

We are surrounded by so much selfishness is this world that it has become hard to discern what is selfish from what is self-care.

It is not possible to be satisfied drinking from an empty cup. It is easy to figure out why. There simply isn’t anything inside an it.
Taking the time to care for yourself is actually a selfless act. Below I’ve listed a few simple things you can do for yourself to fill up your cup

  • R and R.  The value of a little R and R is substantial. Try to stay away from the kind that involves flipping through channels on the T.V. but in the event that that is all you can make the time for, take it, and make the best of it by staying away from shows full of drama.  I enjoy simple things like watching the clouds pass by or the trees blowing in the breeze. Take out FB scrolling on your phone, and you’re bound to find peace and solace in a matter of minutes.
  • Find time. Find time for the things that make you smile. Reading. Drawing. Walking. Doing your make-up. watching your favorite show. What have you. The important part of this step is to find something that lights you up! Something that just makes you feel happiness beaming from within you! Those are the somethings you must find time to do.😉
  • Create a morning routine. Every morning for the last 4 years I wake up and open my Bible app by Youversion.com  It is a part of my life. A part of my daily routine. The available plans span a number of topics. The plans I choose are appropriate for the things I’m going through in my life at that moment in time, and what this does is allow me to focus on Hope and positivity at the beginning of my day. Starting your day that way allows you to more easily continue your day that way. This may not be the exact type of thing you interested in doing but there are plenty of free positive affirmation apps and even free meditation apps they could easily achieved the same effect. The point is to start your day with positive affirmations, positive notes, positive reminders. When your mind is content and well your body tends to follow (as best as it can.)
  • Forgive yourself. You know that thing you did a few years ago that you’re still beating yourself up about? Forgive yourself we are human and to err is human. We tend to be the hardest on ourselves by doing this we do not allow ourselves to heal. By not forgiving yourself, you are filling your cup with sour milk; and no one wants to drink sour milk.
  • Treat yourself like someone you love. Be as kind and patient with yourself as you would with a dear friend. Treat yourself like somebody you love! We tend to hold ourselves to a higher standard than we hold other people we are much more likely to be kind to a stranger than we are to be kind to ourselves.  If you don’t love yourself it’s sure going to be hard for anyone else to love you.
  • Allow yourself to have feelings.  Allow yourself to have feelings in a healthy way. Have the feeling, acknowledge it, and move on.

Caring for yourself is in and of itself caring for others. We can not give what we do not have to give. It is very difficult to have healthy relationships without first having a healthy relationship with yourself.