I am scared….
I wish there was a way out of this..
The Golden Rule. Treat people like you want them to treat you. The Golden Rule. With a bit of effort it’s not that hard to do. The Golden Rule. When you make a mistake, how would you like someone to treat you? When you are feeling ill, what would you want your loved one to do? The Golden Rule.
Follow the Golden Rule.
Don’t treat others in a way you wouldn’t want them treating you.
When I started this blog my aim was to try to stay focused, but, my mind pulls in so many different directions! I think I’ve decided that that’s exactly what this blog will be. It will simply, be. I will allow my mind to pull me in whatever direction it wants to go in, and write about whatever passionately takes hold in my mind, in that moment!
I’ve been contemplating life for the past couple of years. I feel like I’ve grown a great awareness and a very deep connection with my God. He talks to me and he guides me and my intuition has never been stronger!
I’ve learned that I have to get out of my own way if I ever want to accomplish anything! I have never felt more free, more content, more fulfilled in my life, and I’m weeks away from brain surgery.. it is crazy the way things seem to just fall into place, the obviousness of divine intervention, the peace that I feel most days, even whilst in the most excruciating pain I have ever experienced, has cemented that old adage that everything in life happens for a reason. Every heart ache, mistake, missed oppurtunity, all bring me to right here, right now, who I am in this moment.
“This is me. And I am in love with her!”
I have learned to say no to people, people that I love and care about, and for a people pleaser which I have been my whole life, that is extremely hard to do! I stand up for myself now, the way I always stood up for others. I have learned to love people where they’re at, but, I now know that, that does not mean I have to allow them to treat me badly.
I choose to get up each day and believe that there will be good in that day, no matter how I feel and no matter what is happening.
I have allowed God to work in me and make me the person He created me to be!
Getting out of my own way has been the best thing I could have ever done for myself! And it has prepared me for what is coming soon. Every trial, every ache every pain, every hardship, has made me who I am and has gotten me ready for what is to come.
I know there are quite a lot of pictures in this post but you see, I’m very visual. I love the brightness in the color of life and if I can bring a smile to at least one of your faces, then my job is done for the day.
I want to share what Joy I have and give people hope, that no matter what you are going through, you don’t have to be miserable, you don’t have to be ashamed, you don’t have to feel guilty. There is always someone who cares, even if you don’t know them, even when you feel like there is no one. I care, even when I don’t know you, or don’t like you, or really don’t want to *laughs* it is exhausting, but, I always care. I was made that way, and each day I will embrace it more and more.
Be the most authentic version of yourself! Life is to short for anything less!
I knew it was only a matter of time. I’ve been pushing it to the back of my mind, but today it has caught up with me. I don’t feel very well you see.. my head it hurts, my face feels full, my stomach it churns.
I just want to be whole
I guess I had too many “good days” in a row…
The weather looms dark overhead. I wish I could have stayed in bed, butI can’t lay back on this blasted head! Alas, it is too full. The pressure is too great.. maybe I should meditate.
I feel ill today and it won’t go away, it weighs heavy on my soul
The pain looms as Thunder booms with dark skies overhead oh how I wish I could find comfort in my bed..in my body..in my head.
You are either moving
Sour, and standing still
Life if an endless journey of growth and change
Get up on your game
Grow, learn, change!
You use it or lose it
There’s still time so get to it!
You can do it
Put yourself in to it
Or go sour…
Effervescent shining light
Loveliness unfolding in broad daylight
Scarcely huddled under sight
The pinks and blues the whites of sky
Perceived differently somehow
Through pain filled eyes
Glory hidden slightly when life was good
So many things misunderstood
Touch of the divine
The closer I climb
This narrow path I’ve chose
The pressure filled
Deep pain instilled
Not what one would have chosen
Glorious climb towards the Divine
Endless opening of the mind
Difficult to sleep
There’s to much pain
The back of my head
It screams in agony
My mind cries:
“Why is this happening to me?”
1 in a 1,000
Those are my odds
Any chance of ending this pain
Comes at a surgical cost
I‘m not lost..
As crazy as that sounds
Since all of this began
Really, I’m more found!
You couldn‘t pick me out of a crowd..
I look just like you do
At least most days I do
“Normal” as they say, yet
Inside my body
Things are not ok
But the time has come
To pop on my smile
I’ve already been sentenced
Another day has been gifted to me
I will smile thru this pain
Chiari was in the cards for me
Make the best of your hand
The cards you were dealt
The hand is for you to play
No one else..
Always by my side. A little blessing in disguise. Who’d have known a year ago how dear you’d be to me. My tiny fury friend. You are an awesome companion indeed! We almost didn’t bring you home that day..but my heart tugged back to your cage. I’m so thankful I followed my heart that day!
Animals love us in a way that people simply cannot. I am not faulting people, we are all flawed. I am saying, the love of an animal is pure, no motives, except possibly an extra treat, they simply adore us!
I must admit I have never loved an animal the way I love my cat! He always knows when I need him! It may sound crazy to you, but I simply do not care, I believe the good Lord placed Smokey in my life for a purpose. There’s a reason my heart would not let me leave that shelter without him. He makes me smile 😃 he loves on me when I cry 😢 and he rarely leaves my side.
If you suffer from a chronic illness/chronic pain, I highly recommend, from experience, that you find yourself a pet! One that fills your heart and brings you Joy!
We don’t have to suffer alone💜
For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised.
2 Corinthians 5:14-15 ESV
He died for you. It is your choice to live for Him!